Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Don’t Be A Bitch…Just for Him

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Just because you have to wake up, make yourself pretty, cook breakfast, wash the dishes, wash his shorts, go to work, bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, wash that pan, bear the children, raise the children, pay the bills, pump your own gas, do the grocery shopping, feed the dog, schedule the car pool, feed the chickens, sew the hems, fix the boo-boo’s – seriously, do you have to be a premenstrual bitch on top of it all?

He’s the NUMBER ONE reason you need to calm the hell down and swallow some Midol.  I mean, come on, look at him with his jacket over his shoulder and that cool shirt.  It doesn’t matter he spends more time on his hair than you do. Isn’t he worth swallowing your pain, bloating and mood swings?  Like the copy says, “when you feel good, you’re good to be around” – and isn’t that the point?  Cater to him and his whims, and suck up that damned curse already!! 

Don’t be a bitch…for him. 

9 comments:

Jennie said...

This is awesome, Barbara! And he is so not worth it. Even with that perfect feathered Sean Cassidy hair. I feel a cramp coming on...

- Jennie from retro-luxe!

Retro Keith said...

LOL! hahahaa!

Midcenturymadam said...

Reading your post brought to mind that Burt Bacharach song "Wives and Lovers". The lyrics just chap my hide yet I remember every word. What's up with that? Once again, you made me laugh. Thanks for the post idea.

Chickens in the Basement said...

You are funny! I suggest Ms. Midol smack Mr. Feather-head with that frying pan while it's still hot!

Vintage Christine said...

I perceive a bit of male-directed anger on some posts. It's still all about making dude happy: haven't seen any female Viagra yet, have we? Just now getting a possible alternative to Miz Chicken's favorite pasttime, boob squashing. I do have to say, though, that Midol probably saved me from going to jail for murder at least a couple times . . .

nikki said...

gawd. that's a great find. :D

heidi said...

this ad gives me cramps.

laura linger said...

He looks like that dreamboat from WKRP in Cincinnati!

Bill Abendroth said...

To the Editor:

Hey come on now! You think getting your hair, eyebrows and complexion to look like that happens by accident? And I know from whence I speak. I graduated from high school in 1978, and my nieces REGULARLY pulled out my sister's yearbook--just to laugh and laugh and laugh at how EVERYONE (both pals & gals) had the "Farrah" side bangs.

Ah well. Those were the days, my friend--and thank god they finally came to an end.

Speaking of getting made up.....My niece (who's just about to turn 19) has never seen The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and can't imagine why anyone would ever go to a midnight showing of said film. All of her circle of friends feel the same way.....End of an era, I guess.

I remain:
Old & Cranky.
Bill Abendroth
Samsara Samizdat

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