Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Do You Suffer From Nature’s Tardiness?

natures tardiness

Man, there is nothing meaner than Mother Nature.

Especially when she’s late.

Fortunately, the lady here isn’t pregnant, she’s just constipated.

Because women are delicate flowers with delicate colons, Correctol is extra gentle to a woman’s “sensitive system”.  It “moves the waste gently”.  Isn’t that reassuring (and a little nauseating)?

Now a woman contractor can walk through Home Depot with the assurance that she won’t have to sprint across the store because she took a man’s laxative.  She won’t have to step out of the board meeting because she’s suddenly seized by gassy cramps.  She can address our nation without worry that she’ll lose more than her train of thought.

Thank you Correctol.  Thank you for helping our delicate systems stay regular, because that Mother Nature…man, she’s a bitch!

11 comments:

Dolores said...

Oh Barbara, that's hilarious; my mother gave me a laxative on Friday nights, whether I needed it or not...... and I woke up with stomach cramps on Saturday morning.... oh what fun!

Tweedles -- that's me said...

I was hoping you are all better, and ok
you are
this is too funny my silly friend.
glad your better!
You were missed by me!
love
tweedles

3 doxies said...

Well now dis is reassuring...glad to knows dat I can still take overs da world and not have cramps when doing so.

Puddles

Mack said...

We love anything to do with poopies! hahahaahha!

~Kim at Golden Pines~ said...

I've heard that you should never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night... ;-))

1950's_atomic_ranch_house said...

Ahh the things the "Mad Men" tell us we NEED! lol....

Resit, people! Poo on your own!!! You can do it!!

Retro Keith said...

"natures tardiness" .. hehehe ..

ga.farmwoman said...

You mean there were "gentle" ones?? Boy, my mama thought if any one of the 7 of us sneezed, we needed a good cleaning out. I think that delicate flower just needs a dose of castor oil.

Have a great day.
Pam

Samantha said...

You are just so funny and I'm still laughing! Sheer poetry on your part! Keep em coming1
Hugs xoxoxo
Sammie's and Avalon's Mom

Jabacue said...

Too funny Barbara! Glad I don't have THAT problem! Don't know what I'd do?
Jim

DAVID McGRIEVEY said...

I wanted to tell you how much you made me laugh but I just noticed that the word verification I must type in is "menses". I am NOT kidding.
I shall back out of this blog slowly.
X David, NYC

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