Fry, Fry, Fry

Oh man, Mary had it made. 

They raved about her dinners.  They loved her French fries.  Her lemon pie?  The crust was to die for.  And the bitch even won a prize at the fair for her cake.

How does she do it?  Spry!  Nice homogenized vegetable shortening.  You know, trans-fattyville.  It’s a step up from lard.  And we all know how good lard is!

Mary got all her recipes from the Spry cookbook (which of course, disqualified her at the fair, but sleeping with the judges helped). Everything in the Spry cookbook is full of Spry.  Fry your veggies in Spry.  Ham sandwich?  Fry it in Spry!  Junior’s breakfast?  Eggs and Spry!

Yes, everyone loved Mary’s cooking until people started to die. 

She fried them in Spry.  The bodies will never be found.