Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Fry, Fry, Fry

whatshallicooktoday-cover

Oh man, Mary had it made. 

They raved about her dinners.  They loved her French fries.  Her lemon pie?  The crust was to die for.  And the bitch even won a prize at the fair for her cake.

How does she do it?  Spry!  Nice homogenized vegetable shortening.  You know, trans-fattyville.  It’s a step up from lard.  And we all know how good lard is!

Mary got all her recipes from the Spry cookbook (which of course, disqualified her at the fair, but sleeping with the judges helped). Everything in the Spry cookbook is full of Spry.  Fry your veggies in Spry.  Ham sandwich?  Fry it in Spry!  Junior’s breakfast?  Eggs and Spry!

Yes, everyone loved Mary’s cooking until people started to die. 

She fried them in Spry.  The bodies will never be found.

13 comments:

Cooper and Lola said...

Mmmmm you had me at fryed!! Funny post!

Leah said...

A step up from Lard!?

Why have you been keeping this secret for so long is my 1st question?! and my 2nd is, where can I get some?

Missouri Michael said...

Sounds a little "Fried Green Tomatoes" to me...

houndstooth said...

*snicker* At least she wasn't feeding them meat pies! :P

Samantha said...

Too much hah hah!!! Sounds like Lucy's Vegeta...dah dah dah! Thanks for this amazing ad - never heard of the stuff!
Hugs xoxoxo
Sammie, Ava and Ozzie

giantspeckledchihuahua said...

Oh my! I hadn;t thought of spry in a lot of years! Hopefully it will be just as many before I do again!

The Thuglets said...

Spry..now there's a name from the past! LOL

Spry spry crisp and dry!

Big Nose Pokes
The Thugletsx

Mack said...

I could eat it straight from the can!!
Talk about deelishuz!

Dana@Mid2Mod said...

I don't remember Spry. My grandmother and mother were diehard canned Crisco gals...when they weren't frying things in pure bacon drippings. :)

Ah, for some of my mom's french fries right now...

bbes tribe said...

That is some secret weapon ---
Probably tasted great right up until Mary's friends died of too much Spry.
Funny post..
Wags
Ernie,Sasha,Chica

lifeinredshoes said...

It's a wonder anyone made it out alive;)

Dolores said...

Hmmmmm, never heard of spry, but then again... not sure I want to know about Spry... HA!

Midcenturymadam said...

I think I need to go on a Spry spree.

Meet Trixie, Minnie and Jeep!

PitaPata Dog tickers
#1 dog site for dogs & bipeds!
PitaPata Dog tickers
#1 dog site for dogs & bipeds!
PitaPata Dog tickers
#1 dog site for dogs & bipeds!

FEEDJIT Live Traffic Feed