Recipes for the Stupid, Part 2
Okay, how did that “salad” work out for you? Were you successful? If so, hang on, because…
We’re moving to FRUIT!
This is an exotic, tropical dish called “Banana Scallops”. It comes straight from whatever country that makes bananas, but that’s not important unless you’re trying to impress the boss.
Once again, you’re going to have to go to that store and ask the grocer to give you bananas, corn flakes and a few eggs. If you know someone with a chicken, maybe you can trade a banana or two for an egg or two.
The Wesson oil you bought yesterday will come in handy with this recipe. Are your ready?
Peel the banana (have the grocer show you how). Get the hubby’s bowie knife and hack the banana into bite-sized pieces (see yesterday for instructions). Now, break the egg into a bowl and beat it up with a fork. Then, pour out a couple of handfuls of corn flakes and mash ‘em up with your rolling pin, your empty beer bottle or put them in a bag and sit on them.
Now, heat up a panful of Wesson oil until you can put a piece of bread in and it fries up brown. If it turns black right away, the oil’s too hot. Take a log off the fire.
Here’s the hard part. Take a piece of banana, dip it in the egg, then roll it in the corn flake crumbs. Put it in the hot oil. When it looks done, take it out. Repeat.
CAUTION: Don’t eat them straight out of the pan unless you have medical insurance.
Don’t forget to turn off the stove when you’re done!
Once you get this recipe perfected, you can make bananas all different ways…covered in oatmeal, wrapped in bologna, or Banana Kabobs. But that will come with practice.
Stay tuned for more recipes!
personal note: last night while visiting my mother, a cat sidled up to me outside. I reached down and petted it. It purred and wrapped itself around my legs. Then it grabbed my arm and bit the crap out of it. Mom insisted I email the doc, and now I have to take antibiotics for five days, meaning another trip to my favorite place…Kaiser!!
Will the madness never end? :)