Thursday, January 6, 2011

Recipes for the Stupid, Part 3

fish turbans

Now we move on to “entree’s”.  That means dinner.

Don’t mind that the recipe picture is crooked, I just had a couple of cocktails before I scanned it.  Sue me.

Now, this recipe is good for you people that live near rivers, lakes, oceans and fishing holes.  I mean, you can get fish for FREE that way.  Free is always good.  Besides, that lazy, no good, unsophisticated man you married can do it, and that means you can paint your nails.

But since you are new to cooking, you don’t have “staples” around the house.  No, not the ones your husband uses to fix things.  Staples are what sophisticated cooks call stuff they keep in the house so they don’t have to go to the store every day.  Anyway, here’s your list for the grocer:

Flour. Butter (Oleo will work, but it won’t taste like what the rich people eat). A lemon.  You have to buy a whole one, you can’t buy a half.  See if you can go in with a neighbor. And an onion.  You can make sandwiches with it later. Fish. This recipe calls for flounder, but pick up whatever you like -  pike, mullet, catfish, guppy.  No heads. And stuffed olives.  That’s right!  There are people who have the job of stuffing olives.  Imagine how hard that is!

Now, get out your pan.  Use whatever you have to scrape some pieces off the onion. Seriously, don’t chop it, scrape it.  It has flavor and we don’t want much flavor in this recipe. Rub the fish with butter and squeeze half a lemon on it.  Then rub the onion on it and sprinkle with salt and pepper.  Take an olive, put it on the end of your fish and roll it up.  Stand it up all pretty-like in the pan.  Repeat until all your fish is gone.

Melt the butter, then stir in the flour. Pour in some water and make it thick and like library paste.  Oh, add salt and pepper.  Pour the gravy around the fish and toss it in the oven for 10 minutes.

Congratulations!  You’ve made dinner!  You’re almost ready to invite people to your house again (well, clean it up first).

Tomorrow, we’ll finish the cooking lesson with some dessert.

personal note:  I have not started to froth at the mouth or meow, but I do have an urge to sit in a window. 

6 comments:

Dolores said...

The gravy sounds so delicious....GAG!

Sure glad you aren't frothing at the mouth!

Benny and Lily said...

oohhh yummE
Benny & Lily

houndstooth said...

Yeeeeeesh! You lost me! I just don't eat fish, no how, no way! But I'm sure some little lady is going to do her man proud with that recipe. You left out the details about who's going to clean that flounder!

Maggie and Mitch said...

We love fish! We don't care what kind it is!
You're one of our winners, Barbara!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

3 doxies said...

Da only body of water we has is a swamp down from our house, will dat work?
And how comes you don't need empty beer bottles furs dis one? Dta ain't right.

Mum eats fish but her WILL NOT cook it in da house under NO circumstances...it has to be bought in a restuarant. Her don't want da house to smaell fishy...hehehe, hers a strange one.

Puddles

Jabacue said...

M-M-M....sounds good?! Took your advice Miss Barbara and have 'the husband' out there in the kitchen making an adapted fish dinner....we call it chowder here in this neck of the woods. Too cold for him to go fishing today but maybe, just maybe, tomorrow! He's got to do something! lol
Jim

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