Barbie Has Always Been A Materialist Witch

“Why don’t we all go to the movies?”

“Would you like to have a fashion show?”

“Let’s go shopping with Barbie.”

“What shall I wear to the prom?”

Yeah, they talk, they bend, they pose, but they have changed so much. 

Sure, Barbie has that Dream House now, but look where she came from!  The Sleep ‘N Case Motel!!  Twin beds because she couldn’t even afford that place by herself.  She only dated Ken for his car and ability to buy dinner. 

You wouldn’t catch her with Christie or Stacey today, no sir.  Christie marched on Washington became a Senator.  Stacey ran off with Ken’s cousin, but that didn’t work out. Today, she’s a dental hygienist in Tenefly, NJ.  Barbie’s all about the party.

Oh no, Barbie won’t admit it now, but she came from meager beginnings.  Today, materialistic witch.  Yesterday?  Just a roomie trying to scrape together enough money for rent and a Pucci pantsuit. 

The next time you see Barbie, ask her about the Sleep ‘N Case and watch the blood drain from her face.  She’s still worried that those pictures will get out.  Yes, they were “artistic”, but she has a rep now, k?