Your Friends Suck

Did your friends stop calling?  Do they break dates with you?  When is the last time they had you to dinner? It's because of your grey hair.  That's right.  Your friends are shallow little witches, and they think because you have grey hair, you're no longer "fun".  And you're only 32! However, we know that these friends are crucial to your social climb up the ladder, so we're going to help you out.  We have a product that even EXPERTS can't tell if you use it.  Soon, you'll have that glorious, young-looking color again if you just buy a box of Clairol. Clairol is "delightful".  It's all bubbly and perky. Clairol is "dependable".  Pure, uber-expensive ingredients are all we use.  Don't fear! Clairol is "discrete".  Since we won't burn your hair off, no one will know you use our hair color (remember to burn the box after use.) Don't let those Junior League harpies get you down!  Sneak over to the druggist and ask for Clairol, the original shampoo tint.  You'll be glad you did. Now, about that hairstyle...