Feminine Lessons

Okay, get out your pad and pencil…it’s time to see if you pass enough of these questions to actually call yourself “a woman”, as judged by a man.
1. Do you smell? From anywhere?
2. If you wear pants, can people still tell you’re a woman?
3.  Do you like to dress like a guy, even at formal occasions?
4. Do you do just swill your clothes in the river?
5. Do you wear tacky jewelry or way too much cologne?
6. Do you sit with your legs spread apart? Do you slump in your chair?
7.  Do you stomp down the street like a storm trooper?
8.  Can’t you ever shut up?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you are a man.  Turn in your girl card.  Rules are rules, and women must be dainty and helpless until they are married.  Then they can stay at home and become drudges.  BUT NOT UNTIL THEN.
I stole this from Ruth’s pinterest account – she has a blog at No Pattern Required, and it’s damned good.  Check her out!


houndstooth said…
Ha ha ha! Well, I, for one, am always a dainty, feminine flower!
Jen said…
Sitting leaned over my coffee table with knees spread right now, in face (and who wears white? Not I!)
Dolores said…
Cute....I'm thinking and hoping I qualify as a woman.
I always walk with a spring in my step as if about to dance. But then I have a couple of male friends that do that too. I think I may be a man trapped in a woman's body trapped in a layer of fat that makes gender a bit foggy.
And all this had to be done while wearing pinchy high heels, girdles and pads with belts. Not to mention that Prozac didn't exist...shudder!
Eartha Kitsch said…
That explains the chin hair at least.
Anonymous said…
Whew! I think Mom get's to keep her girly card BOL! ;)

Hi ya Barbara! :) I've missed yaz.

Waggin at ya,
Unknown said…
I love this:
Do you stomp down the street like a storm trooper?


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