There IS No Number Two, Bitch.


And this is how it all started. 

Looking like Barbie, acting like Barbie, dressing like Barbie, paying plastic surgeons thousands of dollars to look like Barbie.

Why?  Because she’s Number One, dammit!  Everyone else is just an imitation of the REAL THING.  Barbie is IT.  Barbie teaches responsibility, Barbie teaches imagination, Barbie teaches you how to get along.  Barbie makes everything happen.

It’s Barbie’s way or the highway, baby.

No wonder Ken ran away with Midge.


Barbie picks her nose when no one is looking.
C: said…
(Insert crying Goth boy video here.)

"Leave Barbie Alone!"

That's, uh, all I got.
And, she eats the boogies she mines!
I am currently sitting in a room with approximately 80 Barbies who, while still in their boxes, would not be at all pleased if I were to even THINK things like they eat their boogies! Barbie does not have boogies, just like she doesn't get her period or have a weak bladder. I just got the Johnny Depp as The Mad Hatter Barbie and he's so scarey I had to turn the box to the wall. Be warned!

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