Monday, March 14, 2011

Let’s Speak in Euphemisms!

fresh start pimple

Poor Jan.  She’s “high and dry” because she’s pimply faced.

She “can’t get into the swim” (get it? She’s at the beach!) Her friend says “I know something you don’t know”, but masks it with “want a hint?”

The suggestion of cleansing gel is so remarkable, that her actual comment has an asterisk on the end.  I must try that.  Seriously, wouldn’t that be a hoot?*

So that night, Jan tries Fresh Start  - “mmm, it tingles”. Translation:  IT BURNS, IT BURNS, oh my God, IT BURNS.  But once she peels off a couple of layers of skin, Jan is stalked by redheaded sailors calling her Dreamboat.

Now it’s “clear sailing” for Jan.  Ain’t life grand?

*No, it really wouldn’t.  But I digress.**

**No, really, I do.

9 comments:

DearHelenHartman said...

I just really read your useless tags and I am green with envy at how funny they are. Suppose there is a cream for that?

Leah said...

haha..Betty & Veronica wannabees :)

houndstooth said...

Spoot warning! Spoot warning! If something is likely to come out of my nose when I read the post, it should be prefaced with a warning of some sort! I was doing okay until the true meaning of it tingles came out, and then the asterisk sent me over the edge!

Yes, indeed it would be a hoot!

*I'm okay now!

Vintage Christine said...

I used to use the brown Clearasil for my own personal pizza face in junior high, and one morning forgot to wash it off and actually made it all the way to school before someone mentioned my dry, discolored and cracking skin problem. Oh, THAT was a day that really SHALL live in infamy!!!!!

3 doxies said...

* her furiend kinda seems likes a biatch* why Jan gotts drag da info out*
Hey I kinda likes these astericks*

*Puddles*

sophie...^5 said...

Zits really cause a lot pf problems..The Invasion Of the Zits...another B Movie!

Jim said...

And I thought those were freckles!!!
Jan has a looooong way to go! Poor thing.

That's a 'date' Barbara! When you are in Nova Scotia we'll go to Jane's!!!!

Elyse and Riley said...

Hahahahahahahahaha!!!

I just love the way they used the asterisk in the ad!*

Elyse and Riley*

MoonDoggie said...

I wanna know what the asterisk refers to! I can see it right down at the bottom of the ad but can't work out what it says next to it.

(your tags made me giggle too)

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