Let’s Speak in Euphemisms!

Poor Jan.  She’s “high and dry” because she’s pimply faced.

She “can’t get into the swim” (get it? She’s at the beach!) Her friend says “I know something you don’t know”, but masks it with “want a hint?”

The suggestion of cleansing gel is so remarkable, that her actual comment has an asterisk on the end.  I must try that.  Seriously, wouldn’t that be a hoot?*

So that night, Jan tries Fresh Start  - “mmm, it tingles”. Translation:  IT BURNS, IT BURNS, oh my God, IT BURNS.  But once she peels off a couple of layers of skin, Jan is stalked by redheaded sailors calling her Dreamboat.

Now it’s “clear sailing” for Jan.  Ain’t life grand?

*No, it really wouldn’t.  But I digress.**

**No, really, I do.